Why You Should Not Get Yourself Worked Up Over A Matter

by Bashir Oyetunji

“Only if people could pin down some days of their life, but they can’t.”  [L. A. Oyetunji]

Days will come and go. Sweet days will be alternated with sour ones, and sour days will go away by Allah’s will.

You: “What has happened to me? I have a big problem.”

Me: “Okay, yes, you have one but why should you brood so much on it you allow it affect your productivity?”

You: “It is easy for you to say that. Isn’t advice easy to give?”

Me: “True, it is easy to give advice, but I’m sincere with mine. I want you to stop getting worried.

“Importantly, reflect, reflect. If reflection doesn’t surface now, it’ll later, I’ve noticed this. Many things which happen to us have their reflection points.

“I’m sincere. It’s not gainsaying. It’s not like those other words. Take a bit of reflection on my following analyses.”

Five years before this time, some people had a novel challenge, we’d say. Forward to this time, they may not even remember again, Allah’s willing. Even if they do, it, probably, might not be that heavy like it was from the initial stage.

Why don’t you pray now? Let go of your worries and be favored by the reward of patience.

Perhaps, your problem is a call to action for you, for you to get-up-and-go. Let it be ingrained in the bottom of your heart today that your challenges in shaa Allah will move you to somewhere, someplace. Someplace good, yes. But you need to be patient and prayerful. You need to be dutiful and get closer to Allah. Without patience and prayer, you may not achieve anything with your challenges; you’ll only be brooding and then time will be going off, and perhaps, you may be moved to branch the no-go-areas (all things that are in discordance with Allah’s commands) which you must not do.

Now see, I have two links for you to read



Read them and think about them.

Tulip Flower Blossom Bloom Orange Petals O

Trials and tests are from Allah. I need you to, however, be patient, be repentant.

Okay now see, really, people will talk and stop. That’s the basic. Talks will stop someday. There are enough on people’s table than talking on your matter for days on end.

Okay, what if they talk, it’s none of your business. Assure me something, however, be right. Be fearful of Allah. Be repentant. Even if it’s really a fault from you, repent and be dutiful to Allah. Then know that Allah forgives. Work righteousness and move on.

Say: “O ‘Ibâdî (My slaves) who have transgressed against themselves (by committing evil deeds and sins)! Despair not of the Mercy of Allâh, verily Allâh forgives all sins. Truly, He is Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful (Surah Az-Zumar 39:53)

Never stay. Never brood on a spot.

Where were you when you ate your phlegm and your classmates laughed at you? You can’t even remember. You’ve forgotten that. Now, you’re a bigger person.

Allowing yourself to remain in a spot because of your errors is no solution.

Suicide, suicide you say. It is not a solution for two reasons:

  1. Do you despair of Allah’s mercy?
  2. Ponder on this hadith

Abu Hurayrah (may Allaah be pleased with him) narrated that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “Whoever throws himself down from a mountain and kills himself will be in the Fire of Hell, throwing himself down therein forever and ever. Whoever takes poison and kills himself, his poison will be in his hand and he will be sipping it in the Fire of Hell forever and ever. Whoever kills himself with a piece of iron, that piece of iron will be in his hand and he will be stabbing himself in the stomach with it in the Fire of Hell, forever and ever.” Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 5442; Muslim, 109.

It is like a kindle to your fire.

Just think clearly about this:

Allah burdens not a person beyond his scope (Surah Al-Baqarah 2:286)

Think again:

Verily, along with every hardship is relief (Surah Al-Inshirah 94:5)

Whenever you remember this verse you should feel assured that Allah will make it possible for you to handle your situation and that you’ll come off your problem in shaa Allah.

So, wouldn’t Allah make true His words?

So be patient (O Muhammad SAW). Verily, the Promise of Allâh is true (Surah Ghafir 40:55)

You must be strong.

Yes, it’s true your problem is unique, but it can never be overwhelming for your Creator.

Yes, it is big, but it is always surmountable with Allah.

How have you been living all these while? You, really, can’t even say if you want to. It is unexplainable. Systematically, consciously or subconsciously Allah will make a way out by His Power.

Assure me of one more thing:

Supplicate to Allah.

Utilize supplication-answering periods. Do the obligatory prayers and ensure fervently to do the voluntary ones. Spread your hands to Ar-Rahman to have mercy on you. Seek his forgiveness. Spread your hands in humility. He is the creator of heavens and earth. He creates everything inside it. He sustains them. He knows what’s in your hearts.

Remember my dad’s words, “only if people could pin down some days of their life, but they can’t.” So don’t worry. By Allah’s will, those sad days will soon go. Brace yourself. Laugh. Get to work right now. Say hello lovingly to friends and family. Assure them yourself that it will be well by Allah’s will. So move on. Move on my friend, come on 🙂


Give Yourself Some Time

by Bashir Oyetunji

“I can’t know this subject!

“This language is too hard for me to learn!

“I just can’t master this work!”

These are what you chant every time, and then you make these feelings overcome you in the course of your works. Afterward, you give up and stop learning.

You’ve been giving chance to a thief to steal your important life process. Stop and relax. There is one important recipe you need in the course of your learning. That recipe is time.

Journeying through learning

As a student of knowledge, you will be faced with challenges in the course of learning. A major one you’ll encounter is the arduousness in learning. It’ll seem hard. You’ll feel like stopping. You’ll get bored. You’ll try to memorize but they’ll fly off.

Know that these feelings are normal at the start. If it is possible, you can ask scholars if these feelings still abide with them after they’ve been called scholars. But know for sure that at the initial stage they didn’t just develop magnet in their brain.

Know that the people you now call scholars persevere to know what they know today. They underwent hardship. They experienced headaches, pains, and they burned midnight candles. Ultimately, it is Allah’s favor on them.

So, you too should follow their footstep. Pray to Allah to enrich you with knowledge and its sisters. Then think not that you’ll know everything within a short period of time from when you start. The basic fact, though we’re gifted differently, is that knowledge acquisition takes time and patience. Give yourself these.

Being in a haste too much will dampen your morale. Why? That’s because it will make you feel like you’re not getting anything you’re learning. Ultimately, it’ll make you want to stop. When the feeling of stopping descends on you, then all you’re working for is gone.

Time, Time Management, Stopwatch

Sailing their ship

Scholars of Islam (may Allah be pleased with them all) are people I admire so much. These people know thousands, even millions of Hadiths (Prophet’s – peace and blessing of Allah be upon him – narrations) in addition to knowing the whole Qur’an by heart. I wonder, do these people started and ended in a day. Of course not.

These scholars are easily perceived as “Oh, gifted. Blessed.” But do you think the knowledge just dawned on them? Definitely not! It is a result of perseverance which Allah has favored them with.

The piece of advice

Learning, of course, is not easy. You’ll need to read and memorize. Do not despair. Do not think you cannot know. Essentially, give yourself some time, you need it.

Whenever you’re being pulled down by a block, try to relax, then try again, then relax, then try again, and continue till you know it. Pray always for Allah’s ease through your tasks. Also never be pompous with whatever knowledge you’re gifted with. Know always that it is Allah’s favor on you.

Moreover, do not learn for money alone. Learn because you want to know.


As you relax and give yourself time while being hardworking, sip from this quote by Sheikh al-hadith Muhammad bn ‘Aliy ādam Al ītiyopii (hafidho u Llah) (translated by a dear brother):

نَصِيحةٌ ذَهَبيَّةٌ لِطالِبِ العِلمِ”

قال العلَّامة المحدِّث محمد ابن علي آدم الأثيوبي-حفظه الله تعالى- :

” فيا أيها الطالب اللبيب، والراغب الأريب، اعلم – أسعدك الله تعالى – أنَّ هذا العلم بطيئ اللزام، بعيد المرام، لا يُرى في المنام، ولا ينال بالأوهام، ولا يُورث عن الآباء والأجداد والأعمام، ولا يناله كسلان ولا يُوفَّقَه نومان، ولا يُلقَّاه من قطع نهاره بالاجتماع، وليله بالجماع؛ وإنما يُعطاه من بذل كلّه في سبيل الطلب، ولم يبال لما يناله من كدّ وتعب “.

الفوائد السمية (14/2)


“Golden advice for student of knowledge

Sheikh al-hadith Muhammad bn ‘Aliy ādam Al ītiyopii (hafidho u llah) said:

So I call on you intelligent students of knowledge who want goodness. Know (may Allah make you successful) that this knowledge is a slow obligation, far envisaged (not achieved in a day) , is not seen in dreams and is not achieved through deceit and is not inherited from parents and grandparents and uncles. And it is not attained by a lazy person and not achieved by the sleepy. And not achieved by one who cuts his day with social meetings and his night with intercourse. It is only given to one who use or sacrifice everything on the path of knowledge acquisition, and doesn’t care when he will achieve it in labour (hard work) and tiredness.”

الفوائد السمية (14/2)

You’re Unique, Different, and Special!

by Bashir Oyetunji

You’ve seen the sun, moon, and stars. Do you notice how special they are in their different ways?

So also are the flowers. The roses, tulips, azaleas, etc. They’re all lovely creatures!

You might also have noticed the herbs and plants. You’d see they are all created by the Most High for specific and special purposes.

All these lovely creations have awesome ways they serve their purposes of creation.

Just like the sun, moon stars, and flowers…, you are also special, different, adorable, and useful in your own way(s).

You are useful. You have purposes. You are magnificent. One, two, three, or more skill and ability, you are just the special being you are.

Why think you are a waste? Nay, you are not. Have you forgotten you would be raised in the life to come just like every other human will be raised?

Who says you are a waste? You are Allah’s sign on earth. You are His creation.

Relax, and get not worried. Take your time to think about the following.

  • That your purpose may be different from that of another person

The sun shines in the day and is appreciated by all. It serves various purposes, part of which is illuminating the world, acting as drier for the body and the earth, shinning on the plants for respiration, and hitting the world so that we’d see ourselves.

The moon shines at night and denotes the passing of months. It also illuminates the world at night.

The stars are special in their sparkles to the sky. They act as reflectors for people who reflect by looking up the sky at night.

All of these creations have even much more functions than anyone could say. You are also a special purpose creation just like the stars and others. You have your different roles to play – in your family, in your neighborhood, in your community, in your nation, and in the world.

Whatever role you play should be appreciated and purposed.

Your special ability might be in your affable nature. It might be in your interaction mode. You might be an influencer through the way you solve people’s issues. Your secret might just be anywhere (and never in things that are in disobedience to Allah).

If you are in the position of the sun, whereas you should be in the position of the stars, then you would have been a misfit.

Whatever your position, role, contribution, and achievement, you are different and special, unique and worthy.

The role of forming a nation through your family is mammoth. The role of producing for the benefit of mankind is weighty. The role of serving the world and making it a better place is heavy. Never look down upon yourself by any means.

Umbrella Yellow Black White Selection Espe

  • Realize that whatever you do, you will be raised up on the Resurrection Day

The realization of resurrection, though fearful when thought about, is soothing to your disturbed mind that you’re indeed here for a purpose. Once you’re human, then you qualify to be admitted into Paradise. The crux for you then is to earn the Paradise through Allah’s mercy and dutifulness to Him.

So, why look down upon yourself when you know that you have a purpose of worshipping Allah on earth. This is a great purpose which supersedes many other things. So, you should rise up, worship, feel good, and meditate about goodness. You should not let any feeling of inferiority dissuade you from your primary purpose of worship.

  • Never be complacent about your shortcomings. Work and work to change them

Perhaps what’s making you look down on yourself is that you think your talent is not like others. Nay, you have your own special way. Perhaps it is that you’ve not yet mastered that ability, so go on and learn.

Work and work to change any mistake you’re encountering. You could be like the great ones you admire. In fact, you can be better. Just do not be complacent, continue working even for years. Work, work, and work. Never stop working. Even when you seem to have stopped in your outer eyes, know deep down yourself that you’ve not stopped and that you still aim for the top in that your field, for the best, for breaking grounds in your field, and for impacting in your own set goal.

Apple Fruit Selection Especially Special F
Never look down upon yourself because you are a worker but not a producer. You are special.

Never look down upon yourself for any reason. You are special.

Be positive about yourself today and always. Utilize the remaining allotted time you have on earth judiciously. Work and work hard. Strive and strive hard. Be determined and smile at yourself every time. Love yourself and everyone around you. Get up today and go and impart the world!

How to Get Through Unexpected Reactions From People

by Bashir Oyetunji

Unexpectedly, your loving ones might get on your nerves. They would go deep down your heart and hurt you there.

This is as it is sometimes expected in the course of living. People will disappoint or hurt you whenever you aren’t prepared for it.

Whenever this happens, know that “the time has come.” That is, the time for unexpected surprises has come.

You might feel depressed, sad, or even cry whenever disappointments occur. When you do these, you’re okay. Why? That’s because you’re human; so, it’s normal that you should feel dejected.

However, to be a real human, you need to get a grip of yourself whenever unpleasant events happen. For you to sail the world without eventually committing suicide, you need your armor at all times. This time, it’s not the armor for physical battle; rather, it’s the armor for emotional battle.

When people you don’t expect to offend you do, ensure you do not allow two things to happen:

  1. Don’t revert to being the offender

Yes, do not allow yourself to become the one who would be blamed whereas you are the one who’s being offended.

Wonder if it is possible to become the offender? Yes, this would be when you overreact.

Overreacting to any hurt you encounter will make any mediator forget the error of the person who offended you, and, thus, makes people cast aspersion at your reaction, most especially if you go wild when reacting. So, you need to be calm and patient.

Always try not to react in a way that will make the offender pull all the blame at you. Here, wear your armor of resistance, perseverance, and patience. Thus, express yourself in a way that will convince the offending party or any mediator involved of your feelings and then stop at that. Avoid going to the extreme.

  1. Don’t get consumed by the thought of what occurred

Do not also allow yourself to be emotionally thrown away by the thought of the unpleasant reaction you encountered. Yes, you’re human and you have a heart in you which is prone to being touched by event; however, do not lose control of yourself whenever your feeling is touched. In essence, ensure not to make the thought of the event a lasting one in you.

Don’t allow the effect of worry or anxiety to manifest on you as it has been researched that worry and anxiety have physical and physiological effects which will do harm to your health.

Signs, Stainless, Board, Disappointment

  • Some ways to stay immune of thoughts of an occurrence

Here are some things you could do in order to stay safe of getting consumed by unexpected reactions.

  • Believe in Qadar (predestination)

Believe that whatever happens or will happen has been written and couldn’t have been stopped. So, know that a disappointment is not the end of life and that you must move on in life.

  • Surround yourself with pious and lively brethren

You could also shun disappointment by playing out with your fellow brothers or sisters. Sometimes, it would be possible to share whatever happens and such people will, in turn, share their experience on it. Other times, you wouldn’t share the occurrence but the accompaniment of the brother or sister would be enough as a console.

  • Read or do your best activity

There are tons of good books to read. Find one and read whenever you face disappointments. Reading takes you further than you could imagine. It might take you from your cubicle to a very far place, and you’d see yourself laughing like never.

Also, you could do other activities you enjoy. It might be coding or designing or repairing or even writing.

  • Walk out

You could also take a walk and see the green land, the blue sky, the rivers, or the beautiful nature. Inspiration could even come from there for your writing or your business or for any of your activity.

  • Offer solat (prayer) or du’a (supplication) or recite the Qur’an

If you happen to be in the time for offering obligatory solat, then do, that would relieve you. Also, you could make ablution and do recommended prayer while elongating your sujud (prostration) in prayer to Allah. Also, read the Qur’an and read the meanings to reflect upon it.

A Point of Note

Do not totally delete your friendship with whoever disappoints you. In fact, you should hope that someday you would still become friends with the one who disappointed you.

Sometimes, the exit of someone in your life is a blessing. Perhaps, it may open your face to new things or challenge you to go further in your intellect or reasoning. It could just be anything. So, ensure to be patient and hopeful for a reunion.

In the end, one way to stay clear of an emotional strike is to know that humans are bound to err and may be unstable. So, they could get on your nerves or disappoint you anytime; when they do, know that their time has come. Thus, give yourself relieve and stay happy always. Count any disappointment as an addition to your experience and a way to move on to a greater height.

One Essential tip for Your Success

by Bashir Oyetunji

The belief that you would be successful is awesome, and it makes you one step closer to greatness. Theodore Roosevelt said,

“Believe you can and you’re halfway there.”

That belief you have might have started to trigger you to act like your model innovator and do all sort of things.

Wait here! There is, however, one essential ingredient to becoming great which you must never forget no matter what you do. That ingredient is “learning.”

Why learning is essential to your success

Is it possible to dream of becoming a great person and then those dreams transform themselves magically into reality? No, that wouldn’t happen. Rather, what is normal is that you will push something forward for you to achieve your prospects.

Imagine if you want to know how to drive, what would you do? Definitely, you would have to learn driving. So also if you want to be a tailor, you must learn cutting and sewing, and for you to be a pilot, you must go through training. Whatever you want to be, you won’t get them on a silver platter; you will have to learn them.

Puzzle, Learn, Arrangement, Components

How to uphold this ingredient

Frantically, learning is uneasy, and this “uneasy” attribute of learning is what scares people away. Some even get scared and quit after they might have already started.

To learn effectively, however, you must have three attributes: perseverance, consistency, and diligence.

  • Perseverance is the ability to continue even when things get tough. With perseverance, you would be determined to get to the finish line right from the day you started. This determination will make you resist any hardship in the course of learning. It will make you continue whenever criticism, jest, or weakness arises.
  • Consistency is the ability to be on and doing every time; it will inspire you to be punctual and time conscious. Being consistent would make you avoid wasting time – wasting of time which could result in wasting your life. When you’re inconsistent, you’d be on and off, and for this reason, you’d tend to forget things that you previously know. This will make you go back often, and this is bad for your learning process.
  • Diligence is the ability to move at your own pace without waiting for the teacher. Go on self-study; explore, and don’t wait for yourself to be tutored or directed every time. Read widely, expand your scope, follow updates in your field of knowledge, and don’t stay on a spot or wait to be spoon-fed.

Benefits of learning

You’ll be ever prepared when you learn. You will be prepared for life opportunities. When you know, for example, and then you’re called upon for an assignment, you’d have something to bank upon. In contrast, when you don’t know and an opportunity surface, how would you rise up to tackle such an assignment?

And like they say, learn and success will come your way. This is true when you know. Who knows, you might be hired someday, and you’d have to revert back to what you’ve learned.


It is not just enough to dream success or act success; rather, the especially important recipe for success is that you must know. When you know, then life opportunities await you.

Wouldn’t you rather brace up and start learning today?

Why You Should Not Hide Your Ideas

by Bashir Oyetunji

Are you reluctant to pull out your ideas? You think you’d be bereft of them if you do. This I’ve come to realize that your reluctance to bring out your ideas will impede many other great ones from surfacing.

Letting out your ideas will not decrease your intellect; instead, you’ll gain more by doing so. When you let out your ideas, here are some things you stand to gain.

  • More beautiful ideas will flow into your brain.
  • You would be a master of that idea you expunged, and you’d be able to develop more on it.
  • You’d set a pace for yourself to do better subsequently.
  • You’d be able to think broader and wider, and, thus, expand your scope.

Holding on to your only idea means you have only one idea in your whole life. It also translates to you not having confidence in yourself.


Light, Bulb, Electric, Electric Bulb

Image from pixabay.com


Think of when you eat. You realize that you have to chew and swallow one food before chewing or swallowing another. Such is the similitude of expending what you have; you’d be able to get another when you pull it out.

If you, however, decide to close your mouth to what’s inside it. What’d you get? You would discover that you’d not be able to take in more food. Such also is when you fail to give out your points.

Imagine if great technological innovators did not bring out their ideas. How would they have expanded those innovations?

Do not belittle your thought process. Allah has made it capable. Let it break free of old ideas and move on to developing more.

A Little Exception

Sometimes, however, there may be the need to save your best points for a more suitable time. If you think that bringing out your ideas at the present time may be a waste, then do something at least: write them down.

After you’ve written down your ideas, then try to evade your thoughts from them. Move on to think further about what’s next.

Make sure you give yourself the room to expand. Do not underestimate yourself. Let your mind expand to think further about how to move ahead. Dish out what you have; more will come, in shaa Allah.