People and You: When You Encounter Unexpected Reactions

Unexpectedly, your loving ones might get on your nerves. They would go deep down your heart and hurt you there.

This is as it is sometimes expected in the course of living. People will disappoint or hurt you whenever you aren’t prepared for it.

Whenever this happens, know that “the time has come.” That is, the time for unexpected surprises has come.

You might feel depressed, sad, or even cry whenever disappointments occur. When you do these, you’re okay. Why? That’s because you’re human; so, it’s normal that you should feel dejected.

However, to be a real human, you need to get a grip of yourself whenever unpleasant events happen. For you to sail the world without eventually committing suicide, you need your armor at all times. This time, it’s not the armor for physical battle; rather, it’s the armor for emotional battle.

When people you don’t expect to offend you do, ensure you do not allow two things to happen:

  1. Don’t revert to being the offender

Yes, do not allow yourself to become the one who would be blamed whereas you are the one who’s being offended.

Wonder if it is possible to become the offender? Yes, this would be when you overreact.

Overreacting to any hurt you encounter will make any mediator forget the error of the person who offended you, and, thus, makes people cast aspersion at your reaction, most especially if you go wild when reacting. So, you need to be calm and patient.

Always try not to react in a way that will make the offender pull all the blame at you. Here, wear your armor of resistance, perseverance, and patience. Thus, express yourself in a way that will convince the offending party or any mediator involved of your feelings and then stop at that. Avoid going to the extreme.

  1. Don’t get consumed by the thought of what occurred

Do not also allow yourself to be emotionally thrown away by the thought of the unpleasant reaction you encountered. Yes, you’re human and you have a heart in you which is prone to being touched by event; however, do not lose control of yourself whenever your feeling is touched. In essence, ensure not to make the thought of the event a lasting one in you.

Don’t allow the effect of worry or anxiety to manifest on you as it has been researched that worry and anxiety have physical and physiological effects which will do harm to your health.

Signs, Stainless, Board, Disappointment

  • Some ways to stay immune of thoughts of an occurrence

Here are some things you could do in order to stay safe of getting consumed by unexpected reactions.

  • Believe in Qadar (predestination)

Believe that whatever happens or will happen has been written and couldn’t have been stopped. So, know that a disappointment is not the end of life and that you must move on in life.

  • Surround yourself with pious and lively brethren

You could also shun disappointment by playing out with your fellow brothers or sisters. Sometimes, it would be possible to share whatever happens and such people will, in turn, share their experience on it. Other times, you wouldn’t share the occurrence but the accompaniment of the brother or sister would be enough as a console.

  • Read or do your best activity

There are tons of good books to read. Find one and read whenever you face disappointments. Reading takes you further than you could imagine. It might take you from your cubicle to a very far place, and you’d see yourself laughing like never.

Also, you could do other activities you enjoy. It might be coding or designing or repairing or even writing.

  • Walk out

You could also take a walk and see the green land, the blue sky, the rivers, or the beautiful nature. Inspiration could even come from there for your writing or your business or for any of your activity.

  • Offer solat (prayer) or du’a (supplication) or recite the Qur’an

If you happen to be in the time for offering obligatory solat, then do, that would relieve you. Also, you could make ablution and do recommended prayer while elongating your sujud (prostration) in prayer to Allah. Also, read the Qur’an and read the meanings to reflect upon it.

A Point of Note

Do not totally delete your friendship with whoever disappoints you. In fact, you should hope that someday you would still become friends with the one who disappointed you.

Sometimes, the exit of someone in your life is a blessing. Perhaps, it may open your face to new things or challenge you to go further in your intellect or reasoning. It could just be anything. So, ensure to be patient and hopeful for a reunion.

In the end, one way to stay clear of an emotional strike is to know that humans are bound to err and may be unstable. So, they could get on your nerves or disappoint you anytime; when they do, know that their time has come. Thus, give yourself relieve and stay happy always. Count any disappointment as an addition to your experience and a way to move on to a greater height.

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The Essential Life-Tip You Might Be Missing

The belief that you would be successful is awesome, and it makes you one step closer to greatness. Theodore Roosevelt said, “Believe you can and you’re halfway there.”

That belief you have might have started to trigger you to act like your model innovator and do all sort of things.

Wait here! There is, however, one essential ingredient to becoming great which you must never forget no matter what you do. That ingredient is “learning.”

Why learning is essential to your success

Is it possible to dream of becoming a great person and then those dreams transform themselves magically into reality? No, that wouldn’t happen. Rather, what is normal is that you will push something forward for you to achieve your prospects.

Imagine if you want to know how to drive, what would you do? Definitely, you would have to learn driving. So also if you want to be a tailor, you must learn cutting and sewing, and for you to be a pilot, you must go through training. Whatever you want to be, you won’t get them on a silver platter; you will have to learn them.

Puzzle, Learn, Arrangement, Components

How to uphold this ingredient

Frantically, learning is uneasy, and this “uneasy” attribute of learning is what scares people away. Some even get scared and quit after they might have already started.

To learn effectively, however, you must have three attributes: perseverance, consistency, and diligence.

  • Perseverance is the ability to continue even when things get tough. With perseverance, you would be determined to get to the finish line right from the day you started. This determination will make you resist any hardship in the course of learning. It will make you continue whenever criticism, jest, or weakness arises.
  • Consistency is the ability to be on and doing every time; it will inspire you to be punctual and time conscious. Being consistent would make you avoid wasting time – wasting of time which could result in wasting your life. When you’re inconsistent, you’d be on and off, and for this reason, you’d tend to forget things that you previously know. This will make you go back often, and this is bad for your learning process.
  • Diligence is the ability to move at your own pace without waiting for the teacher. Go on self-study; explore, and don’t wait for yourself to be tutored or directed every time. Read widely, expand your scope, follow updates in your field of knowledge, and don’t stay on a spot or wait to be spoon-fed.

Benefits of learning

You’ll be ever prepared when you learn. You will be prepared for life opportunities. When you know, for example, and then you’re called upon for an assignment, you’d have something to bank upon. In contrast, when you don’t know and an opportunity surface, how would you rise up to tackle such an assignment?

And like they say, learn and success will come your way. This is true when you know. Who knows, you might be hired someday, and you’d have to revert back to what you’ve learned.

Conclusion

It is not just enough to dream success or act success; rather, the especially important recipe for success is that you must know. When you know, then life opportunities await you.

Wouldn’t you rather brace up and start learning today?

Bring out your ideas; more will come

Are you reluctant to pull out your ideas? You think you’d be bereft of them if you do. This I’ve come to realize that your reluctance to bring out your ideas will impede many other great ones from surfacing.

Letting out your ideas will not decrease your intellect; instead, you’ll gain more by doing so. When you let out your ideas, here are some things you stand to gain.

  • More beautiful ideas will flow into your brain.
  • You would be a master of that idea you expunged, and you’d be able to develop more on it.
  • You’d set a pace for yourself to do better subsequently.
  • You’d be able to think broader and wider, and, thus, expand your scope.

Holding on to your only idea means you have only one idea in your whole life. It also translates to you not having confidence in yourself.

 

Light, Bulb, Electric, Electric Bulb

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Think of when you eat. You realize that you have to chew and swallow one food before chewing or swallowing another. Such is the similitude of expending what you have; you’d be able to get another when you pull it out.

If you, however, decide to close your mouth to what’s inside it. What’d you get? You would discover that you’d not be able to take in more food. Such also is when you fail to give out your points.

Imagine if great technological innovators did not bring out their ideas. How would they have expanded those innovations?

Do not belittle your thought process. Allah has made it capable. Let it break free of old ideas and move on to developing more.

A Little Exception

Sometimes, however, there may be the need to save your best points for a more suitable time. If you think that bringing out your ideas at the present time may be a waste, then do something at least: write them down.

After you’ve written down your ideas, then try to evade your thoughts from them. Move on to think further about what’s next.

Make sure you give yourself the room to expand. Do not underestimate yourself. Let your mind expand to think further about how to move ahead. Dish out what you have; more will come, in shaa Allah.

DO NOT BROOD ON LIFE

Happenings abound in and around us. Sometimes they’re simple and sometimes they’re so complex that they get us thinking hard.

Different bits of advice will surface, and this may even be nauseating. You’d be confused, and you’d feel alone even when people surround you.

Your heart would be filled, and your world would seem clouded. But here is a piece of advice for you: Simplify things.

Let the thought of the existence fill your heart instead. Think about how the world has been in existence. Events upon events have been overshadowed. Wars, planned or unplanned, have occurred. Yet here we are.

Look around you, and see the old ones. Imagine their journeying from past ages; imagine their experiences and what they’d enjoyed and suffered. Still, there they are. And that’s because it is in their Qadar (Predestination) that they would still be no matter what occurs.

So, have hope that come what may, you wouldn’t die before your time; what is yours would surely reach you, and what you didn’t get was not meant for you.

Here are tips for you to shun brooding.

 

 

Leaves, Twig, Branch, Sky, Blue, Cloud

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  • Cherish your present

This is our most prized asset – the present. When you take an absolute chance of your present then you’re working for moments of smiles to come.

When you, however, fill your present with brooding on your predicaments or cursing your existence or grieving about the past, you’ll abandon your work. You would feel sleepy or inactive. Later, when you wake up to return to your abandoned work, you’d have lost what should have been earned at the time you were grieving.

  • Don’t think your present state is the definition of your life

Just as the old had been young, and the rich had been poor, and the knowledgeable had been ignorant, so also is your current status temporary. It doesn’t define who you would be.

Only our Creator is not preceded by imperfection. All humans will go through stages. It must be our path to greatness. Hence, work now, and don’t be dejected because you are not where you envisage yourself to be. If Allah wills, you’d rise.

  • Find recourse in Allah

All creatures are cared for by Allah. He never forgets (Qur’an 19 (Maryam): 64). Believe your situation is temporary. Always pray and supplicate. Do the pristine etiquettes of worship and rest assured in Allah.

Also, never despair of Allah’s forgiveness for your sins (Quran 39 (Zumar): 53). Repent sincerely, abandon your transgressions, and then move on happily and hopefully.

The bottom line

Do not allow hardship pull you to brooding on life. Believe things will get better. Utilize your present judiciously, and do not be deceived by the present hardship. Simplify life always. Return to Allah always, and sincerely seek His forgiveness always.

​WHEN ALL HOPE SEEMS LOST

 

Are you in a state of despair? You think your existence is useless, and that all headway is blocked? You think nothing is working right, and that you don’t care what happens.

You seem unable to control yourself, and your mind tells you to commit evil, or worse still, suicide.

Relax a bit! Wouldn’t you rather use that state to your advantage? That is, instead of committing evil, you should rather do beneficial things (by utilizing the following).

  • Get Fiercer to Break Out

When you think that all hope is lost and that you’ve got nothing to lose, then your thoughts would be wild. You would feel like doing just anything. So why not use that feeling to break out of your comfort zone or dormant state. Then move into the world of creativity; the world of unimaginable invention.

Here, don’t move into a state of breaking the bank. No! Rather, let that “I don’t care state” pull you not to care to use all that remains on you to invest, or even to buy yourself a cup of tea in order to keep journeying. Let that down state get you harder into doing your good heart wishes.

 

 

Directory, Signposts, Hope, Hopelessness

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  • Get Armed

You’re already armed with your current state; you’re armed against fear. Your heart feels like nothing can happen that will pain you. Try then to utilize the strength to travel away in search of happiness. Don’t use that arm to take lives; instead, use it to kill the procrastination and block in you.

  • Utilize the Gusto

The gusto is your having nothing to lose. So when you believe that, why would you not apply for whatever job you’ve been afraid or shy to apply for. Sell what you’ve been procrastinating to, as a result of shyness, sell. Talk to the love of your heart that you’ve been shying away from talking to. Explore the halal knowledge you’ve been yearning for. Go out and learn more about Allah and His religion. You have nothing else to lose; so, try, rather than commit evil.

The no-go Area

You must neither kill yourself nor commit illegalities. These two things have absolutely no good for you. It may lead to your destruction in this life and in the hereafter, most especially when you don’t have the chance to repent before you die.

Always have it in mind that the world is a microcosm. Worry less about it, but worry more about where you’re going. Try as much as you can to it well and transit well. Pray to Allah always.

Go forth and enjoy your life in the light of Allah’s obedience.