Unexpectedly, your loving ones might get on your nerves. They would go deep down your heart and hurt you there.
This is as it is sometimes expected in the course of living. People will disappoint or hurt you whenever you aren’t prepared for it.
Whenever this happens, know that “the time has come.” That is, the time for unexpected surprises has come.
You might feel depressed, sad, or even cry whenever disappointments occur. When you do these, you’re okay. Why? That’s because you’re human; so, it’s normal that you should feel dejected.
However, to be a real human, you need to get a grip of yourself whenever unpleasant events happen. For you to sail the world without eventually committing suicide, you need your armor at all times. This time, it’s not the armor for physical battle; rather, it’s the armor for emotional battle.
When people you don’t expect to offend you do, ensure you do not allow two things to happen:
- Don’t revert to being the offender
Yes, do not allow yourself to become the one who would be blamed whereas you are the one who’s being offended.
Wonder if it is possible to become the offender? Yes, this would be when you overreact.
Overreacting to any hurt you encounter will make any mediator forget the error of the person who offended you, and, thus, makes people cast aspersion at your reaction, most especially if you go wild when reacting. So, you need to be calm and patient.
Always try not to react in a way that will make the offender pull all the blame at you. Here, wear your armor of resistance, perseverance, and patience. Thus, express yourself in a way that will convince the offending party or any mediator involved of your feelings and then stop at that. Avoid going to the extreme.
- Don’t get consumed by the thought of what occurred
Do not also allow yourself to be emotionally thrown away by the thought of the unpleasant reaction you encountered. Yes, you’re human and you have a heart in you which is prone to being touched by event; however, do not lose control of yourself whenever your feeling is touched. In essence, ensure not to make the thought of the event a lasting one in you.
Don’t allow the effect of worry or anxiety to manifest on you as it has been researched that worry and anxiety have physical and physiological effects which will do harm to your health.
- Some ways to stay immune of thoughts of an occurrence
Here are some things you could do in order to stay safe of getting consumed by unexpected reactions.
- Believe in Qadar (predestination)
Believe that whatever happens or will happen has been written and couldn’t have been stopped. So, know that a disappointment is not the end of life and that you must move on in life.
- Surround yourself with pious and lively brethren
You could also shun disappointment by playing out with your fellow brothers or sisters. Sometimes, it would be possible to share whatever happens and such people will, in turn, share their experience on it. Other times, you wouldn’t share the occurrence but the accompaniment of the brother or sister would be enough as a console.
- Read or do your best activity
There are tons of good books to read. Find one and read whenever you face disappointments. Reading takes you further than you could imagine. It might take you from your cubicle to a very far place, and you’d see yourself laughing like never.
Also, you could do other activities you enjoy. It might be coding or designing or repairing or even writing.
- Walk out
You could also take a walk and see the green land, the blue sky, the rivers, or the beautiful nature. Inspiration could even come from there for your writing or your business or for any of your activity.
- Offer solat (prayer) or du’a (supplication) or recite the Qur’an
If you happen to be in the time for offering obligatory solat, then do, that would relieve you. Also, you could make ablution and do recommended prayer while elongating your sujud (prostration) in prayer to Allah. Also, read the Qur’an and read the meanings to reflect upon it.
A Point of Note
Do not totally delete your friendship with whoever disappoints you. In fact, you should hope that someday you would still become friends with the one who disappointed you.
Sometimes, the exit of someone in your life is a blessing. Perhaps, it may open your face to new things or challenge you to go further in your intellect or reasoning. It could just be anything. So, ensure to be patient and hopeful for a reunion.
In the end, one way to stay clear of an emotional strike is to know that humans are bound to err and may be unstable. So, they could get on your nerves or disappoint you anytime; when they do, know that their time has come. Thus, give yourself relieve and stay happy always. Count any disappointment as an addition to your experience and a way to move on to a greater height.